Teen Suicide

B̶r̶o̶k̶e̶n̶ Girl: From Trials to Freedom

The heavy topic of suicide filled my 3 hour class last night. Rather a seasoned counselor or a new up-and-coming counselor, suicide is never an easy topic. There’s no cookie cutter response, and even though you may take all of the ethical, legal, and moral steps to keep a client from committing suicide, there’s not a 100% guarantee that your efforts will prevent a suicide. My heart lies in working with families and adolescents, and the hits teenagers take from adults makes me shudder. Somewhere along the line some adults lose reference of what it was like to be a teenager, and their “no one understands” remarks don’t seem to be far from the truth. A large number of teenagers may not have the responsibilities of adults, but I dare to say that the adolescent years are in fact much more chaotic and unstable than any other time of life…

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Dear Brionnah

I know life has been hard but I promise if you stay strong you’ll be just fine. I know sometimes you feel like  why can’t I be just like every one else but remember GOD made you different for a reason. I wish I could tell you all about the person you’re going to become. I promise as long as you stay strong better days are coming. What if I told you that you’re beautiful no matter what anyone has to say ? What if I told you that you’re smart ? What if I told you you don’t have to put up a wall against the world ? What if I told you that everyone isn’t going to hurt you? What if I told you that one day GOD is going to use you? What if I told you that your testimony is going to help someone else one day ? What if I told you that you are stronger than you think you are ? What If I told you that you will learn to love one day ? What if I told you that everything that you’re going through is only going to make you better? What if I told you that when you go to college some of the same people who bullied you will tell you that you’re an inspiration to them? IF I told you all these things would you believe that better days are coming? What IF I told you that one day you and your mother will have a strong relationship ? What if I told you it’s, because you finally called and said every single thing that ‘s on your heart ? I know some of these things sound like mission impossible but I promise better days are coming .

No matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow – Maya Angeloutumblr_envelope_letter

Selfie queen 👑

Self love is essential for a person’s health . There’s nothing wrong with being able to look at yourself and love what you see . For example there is nothing wrong with taking a bunch of selfies . In fact 👆you should be confident with looking in the mirror and not worrying about what society says about how you look . But there there is a difference between being confident and being conceited . Self love is a healthy characteristic one should posses , because it builds confidence. But as with everything else it is important to remain humble 👆 a pretty face means nothing if you have a ugly personality. Self love isn’t just about being happy with yourself it’s also about nurturing for yourself and doing what ultimately makes you happy . When you truly feel happy with yourself you are nurturing your true self. It’s important to nurture yourself and ultimately accept yourself. It’s okay to be imperfect that’s where the beauty of who we really are lies . Everyday we are learning something new it’s all apart of self growth 👑

Trust Issues

Behind all the make up, nice clothes, bright smile hides a story. Deep down inside my confidence still isn’t where it should be. apart of me still settles for things when I shouldn’t. Apart of me is still insecure about the little things like my hair not being long enough , or my teeth not being perfect enough, or just not being small enough. For a long time I believed that if I didn’t have weave in my hair or make up on I wasn’t pretty enough , because that’s when  I got the most instagram likes. But all these insecurities stem from things way deeper than weave and make up. Behind all the make up I carry a  load of pain that no amount of mac could ever hide. My trust issues are out of this world , because  every one that I have come in contact with has hurt me in some way .  They have hurt me and most times I ‘ve given people multiple chances to hurt me more than once . To many people Rape is just a four letter word that no one ever wants to experience but to me it has become my worst night mare. Being raped only gave birth to my scattered thoughts. My trust issues  stem from my innocence being taken away from me. Today I believe that it’s going to happen again. There for i treat every single male I come in contact with as if he is a rapist. Every single moment I am constantly looking over my shoulder with a mind full of what if’s just , because i DON’T want to be hurt again. My heart is heavy , because  I show all the signs of a broken hearted womantumblr_naeblwmQeC1tbe89lo1_500

Finding my Voice

B̶r̶o̶k̶e̶n̶ Girl: From Trials to Freedom

Two months ago I verbalized my abusive past in about five sentences. Speaking the truth seemed too risky; speaking the truth would make it all so real. Weeks prior I kept hearing that small voice and kept feeling this internal push.

“Sarah it’s time. You’re ready to speak the truth – you’re ready to share your testimony.”

I pushed these words away just as quick as they seemed to come up. I was not ready. I was ready to become a voice for change, but I wasn’t ready to make myself vulnerable enough to speak aloud about my abuse. I feared being looked at like a victim, as someone who would have lifelong problems, and completely inept at obtaining my professional goals after having such an recent abusive background. I argued with God, this time I was right and He was wrong.

I feared people thinking of me as a victim, as…

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Trust the process

Process :a series of actions or steps taken in order to achieve a particular end.
All my life I’ve heard trust the process but I don’t think I really understood what that meant until recently. Sometimes we literally have to go through hell to appreciate where we stand in life at the current moment. And some times that’s still not enough . Lately I’ve been feeling like my life is a complete mess but it wasn’t until the other night that I realized I need to embrace this season in my life. I’m inconsistent with many things my relationship with God being one of them . For the last year I’ve constantly felt like my relationship with God is completely on hold because I don’t know where to even start to get close to him again. Constantly replacing God’s love with things that won’t matter when I die. God’s love is so beautiful but yet I keep running from it. I have a purpose in life but it wasn’t until recently I realized I’ve been running from that too. Life doesn’t work the way we want it to so its best to embrace the season we are in to fully understand the lesson . The bible says that God will never leave us for forsake us but why do I still feel alone ? God is still the same and hasn’t gone Anywhere so why do I keep running ? no matter how you feel while you’re going through it, trust that you are EXACTLY where God wants you to be God will not change your situation until you have completely developed in the stage you are in and the season that you are in.And your impatience is just prolonging the process When God is molding you into greatness it may not be comfortable But trust that the finished product will be beautiful

Baby girl born into a broken home. Born to a mother struggling in college and a father addicted to drugs. my whole life i heard nothing but negative things…. every girl needs her father but life doesn’t always happen the way we want it to. as years went on the absence turned into hate. why me ? what was wrong with me that neither one of parents wanted me ? both of my parents chose different lives that seemed to matter so much more than me. at 14 my whole world stopped.  my father died apart of me was crushed but another part of me could care less. again i heard nothing but negative stories about this man.  as years went on i wondered what my father was really like. but how can you hate someone that you never met ? having a relationship with my family was the closest I would ever get to truly knowing who my father was. it’s true how the saying goes ” when you go looking for something you tend to find more than what you bargain for ” but i need to know i need to know who i am and where i come from. months of searching just to have my heart broken more. i ask myself every day what would my life be like if  both of my parents were there ? what would life be like if my father didn’t chose drugs over me?